Signs For Stupid Guests

[DLRFantasmic!Dan]

If you could creat any signs for stupid guests, what would they be??

I found this on Bored.com (http://www.bored.com):

In a non-smoking area: If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.

I laughed when I saw this!! This should be a REAL sign at Disneyland. Thaink about it..................

[disney_dani]

If you could creat any signs for stupid guests, what would they be??

I found this on Bored.com (http://www.bored.com):

In a non-smoking area: If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.

I laughed when I saw this!! This should be a REAL sign at Disneyland. Thaink about it..................

5 years ago, when I worked at WDW at the TTC, someone used this in their spiel about smoking in non-smoking areas..I thought it was pretty clever :)

And I think I've heard it on the jungle cruise, too, at DL... But I agree, it would be on signs :)

[BarryH]

How about putting the "Exit" signs by the entrance and the "Entrance" signs by the exit? I thought that SGs got those confused anyway!

As an aside, I'm tempted to put a sign on my front door that says, "Solicitors will be shot and eaten." :D:

[CerasiJ]

How about this for a stupid sign... there is a gas station around the corner from my house that has those gray concrete posts they have at every gas station, (around the pumps to protect them or whatever) well, at this place, on every post they have a big sign that says...

CAUTION: PLEASE AVOID HITTING POST!

Um. Duh? :confused:

[hobie16]

In the window of a fast food joint in San Francisco was a sign the read, "We Serve Gray Poupon." On the counter was a hand drawn sign that read, "We Poupon Your Hotdog."

[Zazu]

In the window of a fast food joint in San Francisco was a sign that read, "We Serve Gray Poupon."Nutz, for San Francisco, I'd expect a sign that read, "We Serve Gay Poupon." :mustard:

[hobie16]

Nutz, for San Francisco, I'd expect a sign that read, "We Serve Gay Poupon." :mustard:
In Sanny Franny anything's possible.

A young lady in San Francisco had a nagging tooth ache and finally went to the dentist. Because she had let it go on for so long the dentist recommend the tooth be extracted. It was.

The young lady took the tooth home and thought as she was going to bed, "I wonder if the Tooth Fairy still comes around?" She put the tooth under pillow and went to sleep.

In the morning she looked under her pillow. The tooth was gone but there was no money. Wondering what happened, she walked into the bathroom, looked into the mirror and discovered that she had a new hairdo.

[tacoboy]

"I wonder if the Tooth Fairy still comes around?"
that took me a second. i have only been to san fran when i was 10 so i dont remember the gay too much.
i do remember the tour of a prison tho.

[Zazu]

In Sanny Franny anything's possible.

"I wonder if the Tooth Fairy still comes around?"She did last I knew. Her husband and I were in the same model railroading group; that's how I met her. Sorry if this tale has a "Believe it or Not" quality to it, but I do swear it's true as best I can remember it:

"Princess Diana Tooth Fairy" is what it said on her drivers license, which she proudly displayed to anyone showing the slightest bit of doubt. She would, if pressed, admit she hadn't been born with that name. "I didn't used to be a Princess," she would explain.

She was all of five foot tall, and very well assembled (phrases involving small brick structures were heard in her vicinity). She made all her own clothes, including matching capes for all occasions. I don't know who made her toothbrush, but I do recall that it was taller than she was.

She did tooth fairying professionally. Parents would hire her to visit their children's bedrooms when there was a spare tooth, and she would "accidentally" wake them retrieving it. If there was a filling in the tooth, she gave them what for! All kids got a silver dollar and a lecture on proper tooth care.

Yeah, in San Francisco you could make a decent living at it.

I've since lost track of them both. Still, it's nice to know for sure that fairies are as tall as a mouse, but that not all fairies work for one.

[hobie16]

What can you say about a city that has Mardi Gras at least five times a year. A reporter who covered the Patty Hearst kidnapping was asked why so many nut cases and fringe groups were in the SF area. He replied, "There are crazies all over the world but they all come here for the weather."

[DLRFantasmic!Dan]

What can you say about a city that has Mardi Gras at least five times a year. A reporter who covered the Patty Hearst kidnapping was asked why so many nut cases and fringe groups were in the SF area. He replied, "There are crazies all over the world but they all come here for the weather."

For guests with no common sense:

http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y114/DLRFantasmicDan/TJVacation125.jpg

[Cranbiz]

If you could creat any signs for stupid guests, what would they be??

I found this on Bored.com (http://www.bored.com):

In a non-smoking area: If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.

I laughed when I saw this!! This should be a REAL sign at Disneyland. Thaink about it..................

I saw this post and thought I had to incorporate it into my spiel.

So, I did and you find out real quick which guests are listening. The ones rolling on the floor heard me and listened, the ones with the "deer in the headlights" look wern't listening.

I also now add in the fact that your small children are personel belongings and if accidently left behind can be reclaimed at "It's A Small World"

[DLRFantasmic!Dan]

I also now add in the fact that your small children are personel belongings and if accidently left behind can be reclaimed at "It's A Small World"\

HA HA HA!! That is EXACTLY what I put in my HISTA spiel. "To take all personal belongings with you, including hats, bags, glasses, and your young children. Any young children left behind, will be taken to 'It's A Small World' with their feet glued to the floor and sing that hideous, hideous song." At that point, a guest got offended, hehehe!!

One lead even said this: "All children left behind will be the property of the Walk Disney Company and place at 'It's A Small World' where they will be until they are 18 and be given one of these" then pointing to a Disney name tag, lol!

[ThunderCat]

I also now add in the fact that your small children are personel belongings and if accidently left behind can be reclaimed at "It's A Small World"

A friend of mine uses this line in his spiel, then deadpans, "Don't laugh. I was the hula-dancing girl there for ten years. Thanks, mom and dad."

[hhsrat]

Given that people don't read signs anyways, I fail to see how adding additional signs could possibly be beneficial.

For example, in the photograph below is depicted one of the signs marking the entrance of an attraction. Note the presence of (life-size) humans beneath the sign. Numerous times today, while standing less than 20 feet away from said sign, I was asked questions like "Where are we?" or "Where is the car stunt show?" or "Is this a show or a ride?" (note also the presence of the vehicles out front, as well as the sign-mounted verbiage stating "extreme stunt show")

http://www.eric-abrams.net/pictures/data/media/13/Stunt.jpg

[DLRFantasmic!Dan]

http://www.eric-abrams.net/pictures/data/media/13/Stunt.jpg

OT: I don't see the connection between LMA and the sponser, Brawny, :D:

Autopia - Chevron - Yes!
HISTA - Kodak - yes!
Star tours - Energizer - Maybe
LMA - Brawny - Nope

:p:

[darph nader]

OT: I don't see the connection between LMA and the sponser, Brawny, :D:

Autopia - Chevron - Yes!
HISTA - Kodak - yes!
Star tours - Energizer - Maybe
LMA - Brawny - Nope

:p:

AW,come on DLRF,I'm sure the CMs use Brawny to wipe their brows after each show. :D:

[bpgstudios]

Brawny the quicker-picker-upper!
They use it in the new bathroom's paper towel dispenser. :p:

Yep. Nothing can help those SG's. not even a sign with letters bigger than them. Biggest example: DCA.

[BRWombat]

AW,come on DLRF,I'm sure the CMs use Brawny to wipe their brows after each show. :D:That, and I bet there's some residue from that flaming fuel that the motorcyclist skids through. I can just picture a crew of CMs, each with their own roll of Brawny, blotting up every square inch of the stage. I'm almost surprised Disney hasn't added it into the show as product placement. :rolleyes:

[ktulu]

Brawny sucks, I use Viva :)